Don't get me wrong; I'm still optimistic that I'll be making friends and acquaintances and feeling more at home here, etc., etc., etc. But right now . . . yeah, I'm lonely.
Isaac, for all his good qualities, isn't much of a conversationalist, and he's who I'm around all day. Glen is awesome, naturally, but by the time he comes home from work I'm almost totally wiped. (and depending on how isaac's been behaving, i can't guarantee the mood i'm in when glen does come home.)
The people here have been very friendly and welcoming, and I've talked to my new neighbor a couple times, and really, I know it will get better. This is just an entirely new experience for me.
I never moved as a kid, and when I moved from Oregon to Provo for school eleven years ago, I wasn't even beginning with a blank slate then! My sister lived in Provo with her little family, I had several cousins around, and a few high school friends to boot (including my roommate). Moving around within the Provo/Orem area the next few years, I never went very far from people I knew, so even though I was meeting new people, I still had old friends to rely on during times of moving adjustments.
There are plenty of things to adapt to, living in an entirely different environment (small town in the middle of lots of desert and not-muchness). And I anticipated some of these feelings. Some days have just been harder dealing with it than others. I practically burst into tears when my pal Amanda texted me last week to see how things were going. Things are going just fine, really! They're going well, even! It was just a little text made me realize how much I miss my friends. I definitely enjoy alone time (especially when isaac's down for the night), but I also really like being around people. And aside from church on Sundays, I have been without other people for a month. (i love my boys, i promise. they are people. but do you get what i'm saying?)
This may sound depressing, and I don't mean it to. I don't want to make it sound like I'm despairing of my situation and circumstances. I just miss having friends around. A girl needs those every once in a while. And I don't know when they'll start popping up again. (and who likes being kept in the dark about something like that?)
To end, here's a cute picture of Isaac I took this morning.
-Megan
"My mother used to say that there are no strangers, only friends you haven't met yet. She's now in a maximum security twilight home in Australia." -Dame Edna Everage
2 comments:
Megan,
Honey, it will get better and you know it. You're just having one of the normal down moments moms have when all they have for companionship is their children. We love them to pieces, but like you said, you can't carry on much of a conversation with them. Are you still working? If so that takes time out of your day that could otherwise be spent trying to meet more people in your neighborhood. It's probably too hot to go out for a walk anyway. Are there any parks there? That would be a way to meet other mothers with young children. Have you had a visit yet from your Visiting Teachers? That would help you also. I know it did me. ;)
I'll keep you in my prayers honey and just remember that so many people love you and your little family and soon you'll have your circle of friends there too. I love you sweetie.
Janet Hughes
I felt the same way oving to Chicago. I'm sorry you're feeling lonely. I miss you!
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